HEADLINE: Smoking Man Holes
In the bright light of mid-day, the city of Convergence shuddered with a great force. Black, billowing plumes of acrid smoke burst from every man hole, heaving the heavy covers into the air. Mere seconds later, denizens of the underground emerged with an explosion of small rodents. Chaos broke out as portions of the Convergence underground collapsed, trapping many, and killing others.
A man who frequents the underground, Mr. Vaduva, was quoted as saying, "<redacted> <redacted> <redacted> <redacted> <redacted>in his <redacted> <redacted> <redacted>then I'm going to <redacted> his <redacted> <redacted> on the <redacted> <redacted> <redacted> <redacted> <redacted> <redacted> <redacted><redacted> <redacted> <redacted> <redacted><redacted> <redacted> <redacted> <redacted> pulo!"
His statement is being evaluated and translated.
Family of those effected by the terrorist act have not been without support. Groups of people came together, many of who would not typically be near one another, in a show of solidarity and brotherhood. Differences were all set aside in a moving effort to aid. Food and water was kindly sent from the Factory, and many man and women of exceptional strength dug through the rubble, while hooded figures in black assisted where ever able. One man was even sighted placing down a stereo at the scene to assist with morale.
Those who frequent the underground wish to report that the beloved mascot, Dan, is alive and well.
Some groups have come forward to claim responsibility. It is urged that the citizens of this city continue on and simply be careful; live well.
Mr. Vaduva, who was reported to be at the scene, was unavailable for coherent interview.
The chinchillas were also, not available for coherent interview. One, however, did respond with a squeal. This is being translated. We at the Convergence Chronicle have no <redacted> clue what it means, but it is <redacted> adorable.
Reporter: Alexi Alkaev
Reporter: Alexi Alkaev
